Glad to hear you're in relatively good shape. Whatever you paid for your gear, it was worth it for those few seconds.
That said, I've never seen a crash thread with the OP bragging so much about their riding prowess. You crashed on the street and there wasn't any evidence of sand/gravel, so chances are pretty damn good you just plain fucked up. It doesn't take much, and blaming it on tire goblins will only take away any potential lessons learned.
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