Bike For Sale:
2007 Suzuki M109R Boulevard
Asking Price:
$9900
Is the item new or used?
USED
Let me start off by saying this bike is only available for purchase by the manliest of men (or women). My friend, if it was possible for a vehicle to sprout chest hair and a five o'clock shadow, this Suzuki would look like Tom Selleck. It is just that manly. It was never intended to drive to the mall so you can pick up that adorable shirt at Abercrombie & Fitch that you've had your eye on. It wasn't meant to transport you to yoga class or Linens & Things. No, that's what your three-wheeled Goldwing is for. If that's the kind of bike you're looking for, then just do us all a favor and stop reading right now.
I mean it. Stop.
This sled was engineered by 3rd degree ninja super-warriors in the highest mountains of Japan to serve the needs of the man that cheats death on a daily basis. No nancy boy amenities like navigation systems. No, this brute comes with the things us testosterone-fueled super action junkies need. It has a 1800cc V-Twin engine to outrun the cops. It's got special blood/gore resistant paint/chrome. It does have a tool kit though. You know what's in it? A pint of whiskey, a stitch-your-own-wound kit and a hunk of leather to bite down on when you're operating on yourself. The M109R also has a super-smooth, laser guided transmission with spot-on clutch action... so if you're being chased by Libyan terrorists, you'll still be able to shoot your machine gun while maintaining control at the same time. Don't get me started on the brakes. It's as if those super-ninjas stole a set of binders from that Japanese bullet train. They've saved my bacon more than once.
It has room for you and the hottie you picked up on the way to the gym to blast your pecs and hammer your delts. The exhaust has been upgraded to the Vance & Hines "Big Shot" system... which doubles as a 50 caliber anti-Taliban, self cooling machine gun. I also just put about a half-dozen coats of wax on it to help deflect artillery brought on by The Man.
My price on this bad boy is an incredibly low $9,900, but I'll entertain reasonable offers. And by reasonable, I mean don't walk up and tell me you'll give me $5,000 for it. That's liable to earn you a roundhouse kick to the brain, followed up with a three fingered eye-jab. Would it hurt? Hell yeah. You'd end up looking worse than Mad Max... AFTER he rolled the 18-wheeler.
There's only 2,500 miles on this two-wheeled hellcat from the Planet Kickass. Trust me, it will outlive you and the offspring that will carry your name. It will live on as a monument to your machismo. Now, go look in the mirror and tell me what you see. If it's a rugged, no holds barred, super brute, he-man Stallone stunt double, then contact me. I might be climbing some remote mountain overseas, or have Vin Diesel in a patented choke hold, or just chillin' with my woman, but I'll get back to you. Rock on.
Additional Details:
> Black in color
> Original owner
> 2500 miles
> Vance & Hines Big Shot exhaust
> K&N's
> 2.5 year extended warranty
> Garage kept
http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/...s/600-suzy.jpg
I know this pic isn't black, but it's just a good pic to show what the left side looks like:
http://image1.frappr.com/pix1/i/2007...5b90_large.jpg
7135045675
